Now our family holidays can really begin.

Looking back over the past couple of years of writing here, it is easy to see how every year at this time I begin to falter.  It doesn't take much to make me really sad, feel really empty.  This year is no different than others.

Then, something happens every year that lifts not only my spirits, but those of Don and John as well.

Without even attending the Varsity Footbal Banquet, the day after, I can sense that something special has happened.  It is somewhat all about Mark, somewhat all about us....but absolutely all about a Mehlville Panther football player.

Last evening, Brandon Zufall was awarded this year's Mark DeWalle Courageous Heart Medal.

My heart is soaring.

I know that the football coaches probably cringed from the years 1992-2001 whenever Mama DeWalle would talk about the "softer side of football."  Even then, I knew there was something special about the football program at Mehlville.  So many special people we met during those years.  So many special moments.

I know that those moments have been shared by countless parents.  I know that feeling of watching your son work hard towards a goal, go into the battle with his friends, and have a special bond that I think only exists in special circumstances.

Typical awards given out at banquets and post season Conference and District honors have always been a big deal in this house.  The award that doesn't necessarily show itself in team statistics is the one I think will stay forever.   I can't see the MVP, the best linebacker, the record setting yards rushed....still being able to be awarded to the same person ten, twenty years later.   Age, weight, not working physically out everyday will soon take their toll. They are awesome awards, something to be proud of...but understanding the spirit of the game, the importance of team bonds, and promises made to oneself and others will be as strong 20 years from now.  Not much can change spirit. 

As in past years, we knew when the award was going to be presented.  Both Don and I were wondering who was going to receive it, and as in past years, were not told until the night of the banquet.  (Oh, and the work involved in that banquet....KUDOS to the parents, the coaches that planned this event last night...so much work, but a highlight of the year for football players and their families.  I always wanted it perfect).

The decision as who will get the award is left to the coaches and teachers of Mehlville.  Don and I have never "put our two cents in" as the award is not about our family, not so much about Mark...but about the player himself.  We just know that the player receiving it suddenly becomes a very special part of our family. 

Mark loved us.  He loved his friends.  He loved golf.  But one thing I know Mark loved more than anything else, was Mehlville Football.  Those years he watched his brother played, standing on the track at endzones all over St. Louis to catch PATs......the time he told Coach Heyde when he was still in 6th grade "You will win State when I am a junior"...getting his varsity satins and becoming a two way player from Sophomore year on, the State years...his allegiance, love and honor of his teammates and of the game.....that was Mark's core.

I also remember that one of Mark's last thoughts were with football.  The story has often been repeated and remains one of the highlights of my life.  He wanted to see Coach Heyde and at nearly midnight June 12th, Coach came over after being called so late in the evening by one of Mark's friends, Scott Pope.  Wearing oxygen, weakened, Mark asked Coach if he had let him down.....let him down by stopping chemo.  Knowing through Coach that he had not let his beloved Coach down, and hence, kept the honor as well for his teammates, Mark was able to let go.  He prayed with his brother, asked me for medication...and when I told him that giving him medication he might stop breathing....Mark said to me...the last thing he ever said..."It's ok, Mom, I am ready to go."   He died six hours later.

The Mark DeWalle Courageous Heart Medal isn't about dying of cancer, it isn't about a young boy who loved Mehlville Football, it wasn't about the player who to this day holds the most consecutive varsity starts in Mehlville history.......it is about that "softer side of football" where honor, love and loyalty to oneself, the game and fellow teammates, the earned respect of coaches and mentors.......those intangible qualities that don't show up in team or even personal stats.

It is so fitting that the Mehlville coaches present this award.  Head Coach Eric Meyer was not only a coach, but a friend of Mark's.  Both he and Kellie were at our home several times during Mark's last weeks.  Their gifts of friendship is something we cherish.  Coach Gegg read the prayer interventions at Mark's funeral.  Coach Ghormley and his family helped out tremendously with fund raisers.  And Coach Futrell.....he was Mark's true brother by another mother....anything else would get too emotional for me and Coach Futrell knows that.

The decision regarding this award then is made by a group of people who not only knew Mark's story, but was a very important part of.  It isn't an award that has lost meaning for the coaches.  Mark loved them and I know that the decision they made was not made without careful thought and consideration.

We are so proud that Brandon Zufall is this year's recipient.  In coming years, some of the things associated with his years in Mehlville football will fade.  For Brandon, and his parents, one thing is certain:  that his dedication to himself, his personal and team goals, his allegiance to his teammates, and the respect he earned from his teammates, teachers, and coaches is something that did not go unnoticed.

After working last night, I slept all day.  I checked my email before getting ready to go to work this evening, and received and email from Brandon's dad.  It warmed my heart, made me happy.  I know that parents want their children to be noticed for their accomplishments, known for their values, remembered for their individuality, respected by their peers and mentors.  I know that Mark's award has provided Brandon and his family with all of this.

As soon as I can get a picture, I will post one of Brandon.

Take it and run with it, Brandon.  We will forever be your cheering section.  Keep that spirit alive in whatever you do.....and you will not only be successful, but also that person who others see have that special quality.

Find that in the stat books.